Inner peace...

I am passing this on to you because it definitely  worked for me and we all
 could use more calm in our lives. By following the  simple advice I heard on
 a Dr. Phil show, I have finally found inner peace.
 
 Dr. Phil proclaimed "The way to achieve inner peace  is to finish all the
 things you've started." So I looked around my house to find all the things I
 started and hadn't finished.
 
 So, before leaving the house this morning, I finished off a bottle of
 Merlot, a bottle of White Zinfandel, a bottle of Bailey's, a bottle of
 Kahlua, a package of Oreos, the remainder of both my  Prozac and Valium
 prescriptions, the rest of the cheesecake, some saltines and a box of
 chocolates.
 
 You have no idea how freaking good I feel.  Please
 pass this on to those you  feel are in need of inner peace.